


The Unexpected House Guest

by BlazingStarInInkyBlackness



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, M/M, Male Domestic Abuse Survivor, Miscommunication, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Non-Consensual Groping, Past Abuse, Past Domestic Violence, Past Rape/Non-con, Sexual Assault, Suicide Attempt, Victim Blaming, non-consensual everything basically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-18 06:55:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14847902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlazingStarInInkyBlackness/pseuds/BlazingStarInInkyBlackness
Summary: Alexander doesn't need to know about Thomas' past. He doesn't need to know about the years of abuse Thomas suffered or the way Thomas still traces the scars sometimes, wondering if it was what he deserved. Thomas is happy with Alexander and he doesn't need to think about his ex-boyfriend anymore.Then Alexander invites a co-worker around for dinner.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So my friend wanted some prompts for angsty Jamilton fics because there aren't enough out there and I made some up for her. She wasn't really feeling this one so I decided to use it. I think I might start writing some more stuff like this, small angsty (typically Jamilton) fics in between my larger stories.  
> Also, Alexander and Thomas are not abusive in any way.

Thomas didn’t believe it the first time he saw the man again. Alexander bounded into the house, nattering a hundred words a minute and Thomas smiled, slowly turning to his boyfriend and then he paused.

“Thomas, I brought a friend. I’ve told you about John, right?”

Alexander stepped to the side and Thomas stared at John Adams. Adams’ eyebrows shot up in surprise before he smiled like a cat who’d just got the cream. He stepped forwards and held out a hand. Thomas glanced down at the hand before he slowly took the hand.

_“This is Thomas Jefferson.” Thomas looked up at his name to see his boss and a dashing young man, only a few years older than him, standing over his desk. “You’ll be working closely with him in the coming months.”_

_“A pleasure to meet you,” Thomas said with a smile. “I didn’t quite catch your name.”_

_The man stared down at him like he was unwrapping a particularly succulent sweet._

_“I assure you, the pleasure is all mine.”_

“It’s nice to meet you, Thomas. Alexander has said so much about you. He just can’t stop talking about you.” Adams laid a hand over Thomas’ hand and Thomas tensed. Alexander didn’t seem to notice as he wandered over to see what Thomas had been cooking.

Adams smiled and softly dug in his nails. Thomas felt like his muscles had turned to lead and he couldn’t move a muscle as Adams stood in front of him.

“Thomas, I am fucking starving, we eating now?” Alexander asked, turning. Adams dropped Thomas’ hand and Thomas remained frozen in place for a moment. “Thomas?”

“Um-” Thomas swallowed around the lump in his throat. He knew that just a few words and Adams would be out of the house, never to return. But then Alexander would know. Alexander would know how weak he was, how he had never fought back enough. “Ye- yeah, I’m good. Uh- I can serve up.”

Thomas grabbed two bowls from the cupboard and pulled them down. He paused as Alexander spoke.

“Actually, John’s eating with us.”

Thomas glanced at Adams who was smiling smugly. Thomas imagined sitting across from him for an hour and felt bile rising in his throat.

“There’s enough for three, right?” Alexander asked. “Sorry, should’a told you sooner.”

“It’s fine, I- I’m not very hungry,” Thomas rasped out. Alexander nodded and started to talk a mile a minute to Adams. Thomas could feel Adams’ eyes on his back and it made his hands shake. As he spooned the food into the bowl his hands shook. Adams let out a sharp bark of laughter and Thomas jumped, causing the bowl in his hand to crash to the floor.

_“You fucking idiot!” Adams shouted, backhanding Thomas. Thomas stumbled backwards and clung to his cheek as Adams stalked forwards._

_“A- Adams I don’t- I didn’t-”_

_“You little whore! You can’t even do this right, can you?” Adams screamed. Thomas whimpered. “You can’t even cook my meal! I should throw you out on the street where you belong!”_

_“P-please-”_

_“You know what? I’m so fucking done listening to your pathetic whimpers. I think you need to be taught a lesson.”_

_Thomas’ breathing sped up and he glanced behind him. He turned to the door but didn’t get anywhere as Adams grabbed a fistful of his hair and slammed Thomas’ head into the counter. Thomas stumbled and fell, feeling the shards of the bowl cut into his hands as he fell._

_Adams towered above him and scowled._

_“Never try to run away from me again,” Adams growled out. Thomas tried to get his eyes to open properly but before he could, Adams picked the boiling water off the stove and upended it over Thomas’ head._

“Woah, are you okay?”

Thomas flinched back at Alexander’s voice. Alexander frowned and Thomas forced a smile onto his face.

“I’m fine, darling. Just- it shocked me.”

“I hope that wasn’t good china or anything,” Adams commented softly. Thomas’ eyes flickered to him and he felt that all too familiar fear building in his throat. Alexander just laughed.

“Like we’d ever use good china. I think Thomas has some back in Monticello but not here.”

“Not even to entertain your nicer guests?”

“Nah. Too much effort.” Alexander slipped back into his chair and pulled out his phone. Adams stared up at Thomas and Thomas shuddered as he tried his hardest to convince himself that he was going to be okay, that this wasn’t a personal failing he’d have to pay for.

“Thomas, you go sit down,” Alexander said softly. “I’ll finish serving up.”

Thomas nodded dully at the order and didn’t see the confusion on Alexander’s face. Thomas sank into the seat next to Adams, trying to stay away from him. Adams glanced at him and smiled.

“So, Thomas,” Adams scraped his chair closer and Thomas glanced at him. Adams smiled widely and Thomas felt his breathing speed up. “What do you do for a job?”

_”I don’t want you working anymore,” Adams announced. Thomas looked up from where he was cooking._

_“What?”_

_Adams backhanded him and Thomas stumbled back a step. Thomas looked down and held a hand to his face. Stupid. He was so fucking stupid._

_“Talk to me like that and you’ll end up sleeping alone tonight.”_

_“I- I’m sorry,” Thomas whispered. “I don’t understand- why don’t you want me to work?”_

_“Why should you? Don’t I provide enough for you? Are you so fucking selfish you want more?”_

_“N-no, I just- I just thought-”_

_“You thought?” Adams sneered out. “You? Shit for brains Jefferson? Oh well the world awaits your declaration. Keep your mouth shut until I want to stick my dick in it and you’ll do the world a favour.”_

“I- I-” Thomas found that he couldn’t make a sentence. His words stuck in his throat as Adams stared at him. Adams smiled as he stared down at Thomas’ crotch. Thomas felt the sudden urge to run and hide, to cover himself.

It didn’t do anything to stop Adams slowly creeping a hand to Thomas’ leg. The moment it touched his leg Thomas was frozen.

“I work in the private sector,” Adams purred out, his fingers tracing circles on Thomas’ leg. Thomas stared at him and opened his mouth but he was still silent, could still not say a word. Adams smiled as his fingers slowly trailed further and further up until Thomas felt it brush against his clothed cock.

“No matter how hard I try to convince him to change,” Alexander added. Thomas snapped his head up to him trying desperately to say something, anything. Alexander could save him, could take him away from Adams.

Nothing came out and Adams’ hand began to cover Thomas’ crotch under the table.

_Thomas sat on the couch, leaning his head against Adams. He was exhausted after tidying the entire house after Adams’ fury the previous night. The fact that Thomas couldn’t quite take in a breath didn’t help either._

_“Get off me,” Adams spat. Thomas flinched and curled away. Adams looked at him in disgust and Thomas looked away. “You’ve figured out what you fucked up yesterday?”_

_“Y-yeah. I’m sorry.”_

_“Tell me.”_

_“I didn’t- I didn’t let you fuck me,” Thomas whispered. He shuddered slightly at that as Adams stared at him coldly._

_“I feed you, I clothe you. And you can’t even do this for me. So?”_

_Thomas frowned and shifted. He just wanted to fucking sleep. Adams’ eyes hardened and Thomas slid off the sofa as quickly as he could. Adams smiled and grabbed a fistful of Thomas’ hair and yanked his head back. Thomas hissed in pain but Adams didn’t seem to care._

_Adams used his other hand to unzip himself and pulled down his jeans and underwear. He jerked his dick a few times until it was hard. Thomas stared at it slowly. Adams held his cock and slapped it against Thomas’ cheek._

_Thomas flinched before he slowly opened his mouth. Adams grinned and shoved Thomas down onto his cock. Thomas choked as the dick hit the back of his throat. Immediately Adams began to thrust into Thomas and Thomas squeezed his eyes tight as he tried desperately to breathe. He could feel tears gathering in his eyes and he wished he could say it was because of the choking._

_He really did wish._

“You hungry, John?” Alexander asked, turning. Adams’ hand vanished and Thomas gasped, feeling tears in his eyes. Alexander didn’t even glance at him as Adams responded. Thomas couldn’t hear it, could just taste the man’s dick in his mouth and the sensation of throwing up slowly rising in his stomach.

“I- I need the bathroom,” Thomas mumbled. Alexander nodded as Thomas left but Adams’ eyes tracked him as he left. Thomas slammed into the bathroom and sat down on the edge of the bath. He knew he was almost hyperventilating and he had to calm down.

He couldn’t let Alexander know, no matter what. He had to act normally. Thomas pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialled in James’ number. It rang for several long moments and when it went to voicemail Thomas let out a choked sob before slamming his hand over his mouth.

“James he- he’s here,” Thomas whimpered out. He couldn’t even bring himself to name the man but James would know. He’d been there after all, when Thomas walked in with a split lip or a broken arm or a limp so bad he could barely walk.

James had been there when Thomas had finally cracked, had pulled himself out of the wreckage that Adams had left him in for the night, the wreckage that was meant to be their wedding bed, and found a knife sharp enough to slit his wrists with.

James had been furious when Thomas admitted everything but he’d held Thomas close as Thomas just sobbed into his childhood friend, not even understanding why he was extending that basic kindness to him without wanting something back.

“I’m scared, James,” Thomas whispered. “He- he’s a friend of Alexander and he- I can’t tell Alexander! So he’s just sat in our kitchen like nothing happened! But he’s feeling me up and- and I can still feel his hands on me and if-” Thomas was interrupted by a knock on the door. He stood up, the phone slipping out of his hands.

“Thomas?” Adams called through the door. Thomas stepped back and whimpered. He knew Adams had heard because he heard a chuckle through the door. “Open the door.”

“You can’t fucking command me!” Thomas spat out with every ounce of courage he didn’t feel. There was a pause.

“Open the door, vermin,” Adams spat out. Thomas felt his knees go weak and he was barely in control of his body as he opened the door. Adams stood there glaring at him and Thomas stared back in fear. Adams grinned and strode into the bathroom. “You know if I could then I’d take you here, we always did have so much fun, didn’t we?”

“N-”

“What are you saying?” Adams’ voice was so soft and Thomas froze. He knew that voice. It was the one he heard before he spent five hours in the ER saying he’d tripped down the stairs. He knew the nurses stopped believing him at some point. Probably the point when one of them slipped a domestic helpline card into his hand.

Thomas had been stupid enough to pocket it. Adams had been smart enough to check.

The day after that, Thomas had driven for three hours to find another ER where he’d never been treated as he held his broken ribs and wished he could do better.

“A-Adams-” Thomas whispered. Adams didn’t let him finish as he grabbed a fistful of Thomas’ hair and dragged him into a rough kiss. Thomas whimpered but no matter what he did, couldn’t stop the kiss. When Adams finally released him he looked up and down his body as if about to pounce.

“God, I forgot how fun it was to destroy you.” With that, Adams turned on his heel and strode out the room. Thomas stared after him for a moment before he raced to the toilet and threw up. The burning in his throat and nose somehow helped him ignore the tears in his eyes and the disgust that he’d just cheated on Alexander while he was a few rooms away.

Thomas knew he was a pathetic slut, Adams had told him so more than enough times, but he never knew he was so thirsty for dick that he’d do that. Thomas leant his head against the wall and whimpered softly.

He had no idea how he was going to survive the evening.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Major warning for explicit non con

When Thomas got back to the dining room he still felt sick to his stomach. Adams was sat in his chair, chatting to Alexander who was sat across from him. Thomas slowly sank into the seat next to Adams and stared down at his food. Alexander hadn’t even paused in his speech as Adams turned ever so slightly to Thomas.

Thomas didn’t look at him, didn’t dare. He hated feeling like this, feeling like Adams was going to hurt him at any moment.

“Do you happen to have any wine?” Adams asked as Alexander paused. Alexander smiled and nodded.

“Knew I forgot something.” Alexander stood and hurried over to a cupboard. “Thomas normally cooks. I get too distracted.”

“Good looks and good at cooking.” Adams smiled as Thomas still couldn’t meet his eyes. “It seems you got everything, Alexander.”

Alexander chuckled and glanced back at Thomas. He frowned as he saw Thomas staring down at his food. He hesitated for a moment.

“Thomas?” Alexander asked softly. Thomas looked up to see Alexander frowning at him. He felt his heart thump in his chest. He couldn’t piss Alexander off as well, not when Adams was so close. Thomas plastered one of his award winning smiles on his face and Alexander smiled softly back.

Alexander grabbed a bottle and offered it to Adams who smiled before he took it. Thomas stared warily at the bottle, remembering how he’d picked that out for Alexander. Adams didn’t get to touch it with his filthy hands. He didn’t get to dirty it. That wine was for Alexander.

That didn’t stop Adams pouring it into his glass, the liquid loudly splashing against the inside of the glass. Adams then wrapped his tight hands-

_Thomas struggled for breath, desperately scrabbling at Adams’ fingers-_

The wine tinged Adams’ lips red as he tipped it against his lips, not breaking eyes contact with Thomas. Thomas felt himself shaking and he grabbed for the bottle. It had been a long time since he’d used alcohol to control himself.

“Thomas?” Alexander asked in surprise. Thomas turned to him. “You’re- drinking?” Thomas stared at him as he slowly remembered he didn’t drink around Alexander. Nothing more than the occasional glass of champagne and even then normally watered down with orange juice.

“Let him unwind, Alexander,” Adams said with a smile. “I like a man who can hold his alcohol.”

_“Drink it,” Adams commanded. Thomas stared down at the alcohol in his hand. It didn’t taste right._

_“I- I think this- I think it might have gone off, Adams.”_

_“I’m drinking it. You think I’m fucking stupid enough to drink bad wine?” Adams hissed. Thomas glanced at him and shook his head before he slowly sipped on the drink. The salty taste hit him and he wrinkled his nose but persevered, forcing the drink down more and more until the glass was empty. He then reached for another and Adams slapped his hand away._

_Thomas flinched back and stared down at his hands, waiting for the next hit. When it didn’t come he looked up ever so slightly to see Adams staring at him. Thomas frowned and opened his mouth but then blinked in confusion._

_“J-hn?” Thomas asked, word slurring. “Wha-”_

_“You’re a fucking light weight,” Adams snapped out. He dragged Thomas up by the neck and Thomas went easily, legs feeling weak. He stared at Adams and frowned as his vision turned fuzzy. “You still have too much fight left. I want to see you with nothing left.”_

_With that, Adams punched Thomas across the face with all his might. Thomas crashed into the glass coffee table and fell through it, feeling sharp pricks of pain break through the haze of his entire body. He stared at the side and saw a shard of glass impaled through his leg._

_He didn’t have time to think about it as Adams knelt down._

_“I did like that table so very much,” Adams purred. “I think you should pay for it.” With that, he yanked Thomas legs apart._

“I don’t want any,” Thomas whispered, pushing it away. Alexander glanced at him and Thomas looked down. Alexander opened his mouth but closed it again, obviously having just enough subtlety to not ask what was wrong in front of Adams.

As the meal continued Thomas found he could barely say a word. Somehow they got onto the topic of clothing and Thomas shifted uncomfortably, trying not to think about how Adams had ripped him apart for what he wore.

_“So you won’t fuck me but you’ll go out in that?” Adams spat out. Thomas looked down at his suit and frowned._

_“I- I have to-”_

_“Have to? Why? Gotta impress your boss on your knees?”_

_“No, I just- ”_

_“No, I just,” Adams mimicked. “You’re really going to try and convince me anyone wants your mouth for more than fucking? Go into the bedroom and don’t you dare wear that.”_

_Thomas paused before he nodded and slunk back into the room, pulling out one of his untailored suits. It didn’t cling to his curves right, didn’t sit right. Nothing felt right._

_Nothing had felt right for a while._

“That’s a nice belt buckle,” Alexander commented, staring down at Adams’ belt. Adams smiled and glanced at Thomas who looked away in shame.

_Thomas poked gently at the bruise in the mirror and hissed. He jumped as Adams looped a hand around his middle. He somehow hadn’t even noticed the man coming up behind him. Adams stared down at the bruise and smiled._

_“Look at that,” Adams whispered. “You can see my mark on you.”_

_Thomas stared back at the bruise in the vague shape of a ram. There were bruises covering his back and sides but this was the one Adams was happy with. Not the dark ones that looped around Thomas’ neck. Not the purple ones around his hips when Thomas had tried to run from the bedroom. Not the large one that covered most of his face from where Adams had smashed his head into the at cheap wooden bookshelf and left him in the broken remains after spitting on him._

_He was proud of the one that looked like his belt._

“It was difficult to get but good quality leather is always important, wouldn’t you agree, Thomas?”

“W-what?” Thomas asked. He couldn’t take his eyes off Adams’ belt buckle. Then Adams moved forwards and Thomas snapped his head up. There was a cold calculation in Adams’ eyes and Thomas wanted to bolt. Alexander glanced between the two of them confused.

“High quality leather, always important.”

“Y-yeah.”

_“Keep your hands still, you useless vermin!” Adams roared. Thomas whimpered slightly and forced his arms above his head again. He felt the belt come down across his back and he cried out as he felt the skin rip and blood begin to bubble to the surface._

“Thomas, can I have a word?” Alexander asked. Thomas nodded and stood on unsteady legs. They stepped out of the room and Thomas felt Adams’ eyes on his back every step of the way. When they were out of the room Thomas felt himself relax ever so slightly.

“What is it?”

“What’s going on?”

“Wh-what?” Thomas asked.

“You look like you’re about to throw up. You spent so long in the bathroom earlier I sent John in after you. You aren’t talking to him or- look, I should’a told you beforehand but he’s just a work friend.”

“It’s nothing, okay?”

“Bullshit,” Alexander spat out. Thomas flinched and Alexander blinked in surprise. “Thomas?”

“It’s nothing,” Thomas whispered. Alexander reached out a hand and Thomas forced himself to stay still.

“You can tell me. Anything.”

“I’m just not feeling great, okay?” Thomas lied. “I- I wanna go lie down.”

Alexander stared at Thomas for several long moments before he sighed and nodded.

“Okay. I- I need to talk to John about a couple of things for work. I’ll be with you soon.”

Thomas leant forwards and slowly kissed Alexander’s head. Alexander smiled up at him.

“I love you, Alexander,” Thomas whispered, pressing his nose against Alexander’s forehead and waiting for the words that Adams had never given him in return. Adams had never told him he loved Thomas. He said he loved how Thomas looked, fucked out and crying or bruised and battered, bleeding and sobbing for mercy. Adams said how much he loved Thomas’s skills, how pliant he was, how fuckable, how good he was when Adams drugged him by pouring contaminated wine down his throat. Not once did Adams say he loved Thomas.

In that moment Thomas needed those words so fucking badly.

Alexander chuckled and gently pushed Thomas away. “You’re such a sap. Go lie down.”

Thomas stared at him, feeling his glass mask ready to crack. Then he just nodded weakly and turned on his heels to their shared bed. He sank onto the bed and pulled the covers around him. He turned on his side and let the emotions in his chest overflow as he began to sob.

Time seemed to crawl on as he hid under the covers letting himself fall apart. Eventually he heard the door slam shut. His tears stopped almost immediately and he smiled as a sense of comfort overcame him again.

Adams was gone. He was safe.

Thomas took in a deep breath. He had to tell Alexander. He had to tell Alexander that night. No matter how Alexander would react, Thomas had to tell him. Thomas had started eyeing engagement rings in the jewellers on the way back from work and it wasn’t fair on Alexander to not know.

A knock came on the door and Thomas sat up slightly. He took in a deep breath before he nodded.

“Come in.”

He could do this. He was Thomas Jefferson. He was-

As the door opened to reveal Adams all the bravery flooded from Thomas’ system. The sense of safety vanished so fast it gave him whiplash. Adams advanced into the room and Thomas scrambled to his feet.

“Wh-where’s Alexander?”

“Gone to get some more wine,” Adams purred out. Thomas stepped back and felt his back press against the wall. Adams grinned and Thomas froze. “Get on the bed.”

“N-no.”

“Now.”

Thomas felt his muscles collapse as he sank onto the bed. His heart was thundering in his chest and he felt sick but nothing happened as Adams stepped forwards. Adams ran a gentle hand down Thomas’ face before he backhanded him. Thomas’ eyes filled with tears but he couldn’t force his body up.

“Strip,” Adams whispered out. Thomas brought shaking hands up to his top button and undid it. There was a voice screaming in his head that he didn’t want this, he wanted Alexander, he wanted to be safe.

More overpowering was the voice screaming at him not to be hurt. Adams would break his arm without a second thought. Thomas was completely at his mercy and Thomas knew what that meant.

“Even after all this time you’re so pathetic, aren’t you? So desperate for my cock that you’re ready to be taken right here.” Adams scoffed as he pulled out his dick. Thomas stared at it numbly as he saw it was already hard. “Suck it, bitch.”

Thomas slipped onto his knees, feeling his bare ass brush against the carpet. He parted his lips and Adams shoved him down on his dick, causing Thomas to choke. It had been too long since he’d bottomed and Alexander was always far too eager to show just how talented his mouth was.

Adams moaned above him and Thomas shuddered at the noise from his nightmares. None of it felt real as he choked and gagged around the thick length in his mouth. Adams grabbed Thomas’ throat and began to press down, putting as much pressure as he could on the windpipe. Thomas gasped and opened his mouth wider which let Adams fuck even further down.

“I can fucking feel my own dick,” Adams growled out. Thomas felt hot tears streaking down his face. “You’re nothing more than something for me to stick my dick in.” Thomas gagged and felt bile rise in his throat and Adams pulled his dick out and threw him to the side. Thomas lay on the carpet, shivering as he tried to breathe and not make a noise. Adams wouldn’t want that. Adams never wanted that.

Thomas curled in on himself and grabbed his arm to his chest, feeling cold. He wanted Alexander. He wanted James. He wanted anyone apart from Adams.

“Get onto the bed,” Adams commanded. Thomas stayed still for a moment before his hair was yanked upwards. Adams pulled him up to face him before he punched him hard in the gut. Thomas doubled over and Adams threw him onto the bed. “You’re damn lucky I respect Alexander. Don’t wanna break his toy. Now tell me where the lube it.”

“T-the bedside- bedside cabinet,” Thomas whispered. Adams nodded and yanked the drawer open and pulled out the lube. He shoved Thomas onto his back and spread his legs wide open.

“I’m tempted to fuck you raw, show you why you don’t fuckin leave me,” Adams growled out. “But I know Alexander will want you again. Why else why he put up with something as fucking disgusting as you? I know I only ever used you for sex. Sex, cooking, cleaning, just what he uses you for.”

Thomas flinched away slightly and Adams chuckled as he dug his nails into Thomas’ hips. Thomas gasped as he felt blood begin to dribble down his legs.

“Does he use you for anything else?” Adams asked. “Does he do anything other than fuck you and then ignore you? How often is your dick so wet you beg for him to leave his office, you’re so desperate to be fucked you’d take your own finger to bounce on, and he just ignores you to work? It’s because your hole is worthless. I bet he’d rather fuck his own hand some days than you.”

Thomas looked away and Adams slapped him. Thomas turned back with tears in his eyes and Adams grinned.

“You’re a cock warmer, Thomas. And that’s all you’ve ever been worth.”

“Please-” Thomas whimpered. Adams rolled his eyes before he grabbed Thomas’ neck and began to squeeze again. Thomas scrabbled at the hands as he felt his eyes bulge out. Adams smiled down, rubbing his erect penis against Thomas’ stomach.

“You look so very pretty choking. Just about the only time you do.”

“A- Ad-” Thomas rasped out. Adams let go of his throat and Thomas coughed and choked. He knew he’d have a bruise the next day but he still couldn’t motivate himself to move off the bed despite the disgust and fear that filled him.

Adams squirted some lube on his finger and shoved it into Thomas. Thomas jolted forwards and whined but that didn’t stop Adams as he moved the finger around quickly and roughly. Adams added a second finger and Thomas shouted out as Adams’ ring dug in. Adams chuckled as Thomas continued to whimper and shudder.

“Like that, huh?”

“P-please- stop!”

Adams stopped at that and Thomas stared at him. Then Adams punched him in the gut, his ring opening a cut. Adams then punched him in the side and Thomas screamed out in agony as he curled in on himself. Adams punched him again and again until he dragged Thomas up by his hair.

“You never fucking command me!” Adams shouted. Thomas breathed heavily, it felt like at least one of his ribs were broken.

“I- I’m sorry!”

“You are a toy! A worthless slut who doesn’t deserves to lick my boots!” Adams screamed. Thomas curled away as he was hit again. “You think you can command me?”

“I’m sorry!” Thomas sobbed quietly. Adams threw him back to the bed and grabbed the lube. He thrusted three fingers inside Thomas and Thomas screamed again. He sobbed and screamed as Adams pulled his finger out, the ring dragging at his tender skin.

Adams then lined himself up and sank down in one smooth stroke. Thomas screamed and Adams grinned as he leant down and bit down hard on Thomas’ nipple. Thomas shouted out and continued to sob. His dick rubbed uselessly against Adams’ stomach, soft as silk.

Thomas lost himself as Adams slammed into him again and again, forcing Thomas’ head to hit the headboard again and again.

Suddenly it stopped.

Thomas opened his eyes slowly to see Adams looking over his shoulder at the open door. Alexander stood there, staring at Thomas’ ass that was stuffed full of Adams’ cock. Thomas opened his mouth to say something but he had nothing.

Alexander glanced at Thomas’ face for a moment and Thomas could feel the agony running through Alexander.

Then Alexander turned on his heel and was running.

Thomas tried to sit up but Adams restrained him. Adams waited until the door slammed shut. He then smiled.

“Looks like your boyfriend now knows what a desperate little whore you are, Thomas.” Adams bent down and bit down hard on Thomas’ neck. Thomas whimpered as he felt his skin break. “But I like Alexander and he’ll probably be upset with me showing him how pathetic you are. So, I think you should pay for that.”

Thomas closed his eyes, accepting his punishment. He was a whore, a slut, he had never deserved Alexander and now Alexander knew.

He deserved everything Adams would do to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone's wondering the salty taste in the wine Thomas notices is Rohypnal (is that how you spell it?) If your drink ever suddenly tastes salty be very very careful. I think it actually works a bit slower irl than in this fic but it's a very common date rape drug so basically always remember to watch your drinks because some people are scum


	3. Chapter 3

Thomas lay in the bed, feeling Adams’ jizz slowly cooling down his legs. He didn’t have the energy to stand and he couldn’t see the point. Alexander was gone. Adams was gone. Thomas was alone.

And it had never hurt so much.

He’d run out of tears what felt like years ago. He knew he should move but he couldn’t. He had nothing left. Adams was right. He could just walk back into this house whenever he wanted, fuck Thomas raw. Thomas was nothing and he always would be.

Thomas felt another drop of jizz drop out of his hole and onto his legs and he wondered for a moment if he could just die lying there in the bed. He heard a key in the door and he flinched. He knew Adams would come back. The man had promised he would.

He still didn’t have enough energy to get up.

The door slammed shut and Thomas heard footsteps running.

“Thomas! Thomas!”

Thomas looked up at the voice. It wasn’t Adams. It wasn’t Alexander.

It was James.

“James.” Thomas tried to shout. It came out as barely move than a whisper and he felt seconds from throwing up. He looked to the side and saw the bottle of lube. Adams had secured the lid at least. Thomas knocked it onto the floor and heard it clatter against a book he’d left on the floor. The footsteps paused before they began to approach the room.

James opened the door slowly and when he saw Thomas he froze. Thomas looked away, knowing he was revolting. He tried to close his legs but couldn’t. Adams had done something to his right hip, it looked out of place and hurt like hell.

“I’m sorry,” Thomas whispered. James stared at him like Thomas had just killed his dog and Thomas found fresh tears building in his eyes. “Alexander saw me, James. Sa- saw me being used as his fucking cum dumpster.”

“Thomas-” James whispered. He broke off and shook his head. He slowly stepped forwards and shrugged off his coat and laid it over Thomas. “Can you sit up?”

“N-no.”

“Okay. Thomas we need to get you to the-”

“No. No I- I’m not going, James. I’m not!”

“Thomas-”

“Don’t make a stranger touch me,” Thomas begged. James sighed before he nodded.

“Okay.” James gently touched Thomas’ right leg and Thomas flinched back. James paused, “Can you straighten it?”

“Yes,” Thomas said, doing nothing. James glanced at him and Thomas took in a breath. He forced his leg out and screamed. James grabbed his leg and held it half bent.

“Fuck, stop.” James stared at Thomas like he was mad and Thomas whimpered again. “That’s a no, Thomas. You fucking know that.”

“Alexander saw,” Thomas whispered. James shook his head and gently pulled the duvet over Thomas’ hips.

“What happened? From- from after that phone call.”

“James-”

“Okay then, where’s Alexander? He’s not answering his phone.”

“He saw me put in my place,” Thomas whispered. James sighed and looked away.

“This- this isn’t your place, Thomas. This is- this is not your place.”

“I let him fuck me. I- I just lay there. I- I cheated on Alexander, James. I-” Thomas wiped at his eyes and turned away. James sighed.

“Thomas, I need to call an ambulance. I won’t make you go anywhere and I’ll do everything I can to make sure they don’t touch you but I cannot fix your hip and if there’s something really wrong with it then you might need a hospital.”

“James-”

“Thomas, if I could keep you safe I would. The second I got that voicemail I came here. I-” James shook his head and just sighed.

“Call them,” Thomas whispered. James nodded and smiled before he stood and grabbed his phone. He punched in three numbers and Thomas closed his eyes.

“Hello, 911, I need an ambulance. My friend has been raped. Yeah he’s conscious. He can’t walk, something’s wrong with his hip and he can’t move it.”

James’ voice faded into nothing as Thomas remembered the look on Alexander’s face. Thomas closed his eyes and faded into nothing once more.

 

Alexander slammed the glass down. He gestured for the bartender but the man paused.

“You’ve had a lot already.”

“Fucking know that. ‘s why I come to a f’ck’n’ b’r,” Alexander slurred out. The man sighed.

“You got someone I should call?”

“N’th’r wh’sky.”

“Look-”

Alexander groaned before he hauled himself to his feet. John’s house was close enough. He stumbled out of the bar, just about managing to put one foot in front of the other. He knew his phone had been ringing but he didn’t want to answer it.

He’d trusted Thomas. He’d trusted Thomas to not go behind his back and fuck his co-worker. The thought of Thomas’ gaping asshole came into Alexander mind and he bunched his hand into a fist. Adams was wider than he was and it had stretched Thomas’ hole wider than the few times Alexander had managed to fuck him.

Not that it was easy, Thomas hated bottoming for Alexander. He’d refused multiple times. Alexander had never let it bother him but seeing Thomas open his legs so easily for a man he’d never met before made anger run through Alexander and helplessness.

He obviously hadn’t noticed his relationship falling apart so much that Thomas decided to go fuck some stranger. It had taken months for Alexander and Thomas to have sex and yet hours for Adams and Thomas.

Alexander realised he was in front of John’s door and he banged on it.

“John!” Alexander shouted. “JOHN!”

It took a few minutes for John to open the door but when he did he looked exhausted.

“What’s going on?”

“Thomas’s a f’ck’n’ sl’t,” Alexander mumbled out. “Takes it up the arse ‘s long as ‘s n’t me.”

John frowned and blinked in confusion.

“What?”

“Ch’t’d on m’. W’th m’ f’ck’n c’w’rk’r.”

“Jesus, okay.” John sighed. “You’re going to bed.”

“Noooooo,” Alexander whined. John rolled his eyes. “Wanna get druuunk!”

“You managed that,” John mumbled. He dragged Alexander to the spare bedroom despite his protests. He then snagged Alexander’s phone. He skimmed over the number of voicemails James had sent to Alexander. Thomas didn’t need his friend to defend him.

John punched in a message to Thomas.

**To: <3**

**This is John. Alexander told me what you did. I told you not to break his heart and this is what you do it over? Just so you could get fucked? You disgust me, Jefferson and I stg you’ll get what’s coming to you.**

 

Thomas stared at the ceiling of the hospital numbly. Despite their best efforts his leg had been set and splinted by a stranger. It turned out Adams had somehow ripped it out of its socket, breaking some of the ligaments on the way.

He was due in surgery within the hour as they tried to piece him back together. The rape kit had been done and it had been just as devastating as Thomas had always suspected. Having a stranger shove a finger up his arse had never been his favourite experience, especially when he could still feel Adams’ in there.

James had been there throughout and when Thomas had broken down on his shoulder James had just held him close.

“Are you going to the police this time?” James asked softly. Thomas shrugged numbly. “You- you have enough to send him to jail. I doubt he’d even plead not guilty.”

“Don’t wanna talk about it,” Thomas whispered. James sighed and nodded. “I want Alexander.”

“I’m trying to figure out where he is. He- I’ll find him. He’ll be here when you wake up from surgery.”

“Yeah.” Thomas curled in on himself slightly and James frowned.

“Thomas, it’ll- it’ll work out.”

“He saw me cheating, James. Why would he ever want something like me?”

 

Alexander sat at John’s breakfast bar, staring angrily into his coffee. John stepped into the room and paused. Alexander glanced up before he stared down again.

“You hungover?”

“Yeah,” Alexander grumbled. John hummed gently and sat down next to him.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“Nothing to talk about,” Alexander muttered. John raised an eyebrow and waited. He knew Alexander well enough that there was always something to talk about. Sure enough it only took a few moments before Alexander was talking.

“I could hear them moaning from when I walked in the fucking door!” Alexander exclaimed. “If he- if he wanted to open the relationship then that’s one fucking thing. He wanted to open it to Adams, that’s one thing. Him fucking off in the middle of a meal and then getting me sent out like some kind of errand boy so he could have Adams’ cock in his ass? I just don’t fucking understand it, John! And- and he hasn’t texted or called me, just James. I don’t need his friend making excuses for him. Thomas seems to not even think I deserve an explanation for why he cheated on me! And I saw them! It- it looked so- I don’t ever top. Thomas hates it. But he’ll take it from Adams? I don’t get it, John! And if I try to talk to him about it I’ll probably just punch him in his fucking face and-” Alexander broke off and scowled. John quirked an eyebrow.

“You sure he doesn’t deserve it? I mean, this is real shitty.”

“I just don’t fucking understand!” Alexander cried out before resting his head on the table.

“Well-” John broke off as Alexander’s phone buzzed. Alexander grabbed it and frowned.

“Unknown number. Gimme a mo.”

John nodded as Alexander answered the call.

“Hello? This is Alexander Hamilton.”

“Mr Hamilton, we have you down as the emergency contact for Thomas Jefferson, is this correct?”

Alexander frowned before he responded.

“Yeah.”

“Well Mr Jefferson has had a fairly serious reaction to the anaesthetic and-”

“Wait, who is this?”

“I’m sorry,” the voice on the phone said. “I’m Dr Haywood from Chorus Hospital.”

“Thomas is in hospital?” Alexander asked, standing. John stared at him in shock.

“Yes. He was admitted last night and has just emerged from surgery for a badly dislocated hip. What’s your relation to the patient?”

“I’m his-” Alexander paused. “We’re dating.”

“Well, I’d like you to come to the hospital just so we can talk. He’s still unconscious for now and when he comes to he’ll remain sedated so he cannot make decisions.”

“O-okay. I’ll- I’ll be there.” Alexander hung up and stared into the near distance for several long moments. John stared at him in confusion.

“What happened?”

“I- I don’t know. I think something- something terrible.”

 

Thomas didn’t come to properly. The world was spinning and his vision was fuzzy. Beyond that, Alexander was in front of him. He knew that Alexander wouldn’t come back, not for a useless slut like him.

“Alexander,” Thomas whispered. Alexander turned to stare at him and frowned.

“I didn’t leave you like this.” Alexander’s voice sounded like it came through treacle, nothing made sense.

“Course you didn’t.”

“So what happened?”

“Adams wanted me to suffer like I should’a,” Thomas muttered. Alexander scowled at that.

“What? Why don’t- I don’t understand!”

“I rolled over and let him fuck me again,” Thomas whispered. “This time he didn’t need to drug me.”

There was silence for a long moment as Thomas stared at his fingers as they slowly curled on his command.

“Drug?”

“Ye’. Li-like now. Made me less prudish.”

“I don’t understand,” There was something tight and dangerous in Alexander’s voice but Thomas didn’t stop talking.

“Can’t bottom without drugs. Could do it now.” Thomas half sat up and then paused at the wave of dizziness. He sank back down. “He ripped me open ‘nough you can still fit in without lube.”

Alexander was silent and Thomas waited for the hit to come.

“Thomas, when- when did you first meet Adams?”

“Seven years ago? Then we dated and he hurt me. Taught me how to be the proper bitch. Made me cook and clean for him. Beat me when I didn’t do it right. Burned my hands when I messed up and he felt kind. Burned my junk when I messed up his food too much,” Thomas mumbled out the words, as if it had happened to someone else, as if he didn’t still have nightmares about it.

“His food?”

“I didn’t eat. Was too fat, see. ‘S why I’m good now. Don’t wanna be too fat for you. I’m good though. You never need to hit me or break my ribs. Not like Adams. I’m good for you.”

Alexander stared at Thomas for several long moments.

“You think you act good for me so I don’t hit you?” Alexander asked, voice low and dangerous. Thomas frowned and shook his head.

“I can cope with being hit. Didn’t like it when he fucked me without permission. Didn’t like it when you walked in on it.”

Alexander stared at Thomas for a moment, disgust obvious on his face. Thomas felt his heart sinking as Alexander whirled on his heel and stormed from the room. Thomas laid back and felt tears dripping down his face.

Alexander had seen that he could be a good toy for him, could cook and clean. He’d seen everything that Thomas had to offer. Thomas had explained how he could make it better. And after all of that, Thomas was still not enough.


	4. Chapter 4

James walked back into Thomas’ hospital room to see him sobbing. James paused and set the coffee he’d bought down on the side.

“Thomas?”

“He doesn’t want me,” Thomas mumbled. James’ eyes widened.

“What?”

“Alexander saw sense and left me,” Thomas whispered. “I’m not even good enough for his cock, James.”

“Slow down.”

“I told him. Told him that Adams used me again.”

“And where is he?”

“Left.”

James stared at him before he breathed out and sank into the seat next to Thomas. He carefully took Thomas’ hand, careful to avoid the bruised knuckles.

“Then he isn’t worth anything.”

“Should’a just let him fuck me,” Thomas whispered. “Should’a- should’a-” Thomas broke into tears again and James shook his head.

“Come on, Thomas,” James sighed. “I- he’s a monster, Thomas and-”

“I could’a done anything for Alexander!” Thomas wailed. “I love him, James! Wanted to marry him!”

James paused at that and sighed. He’d suspected it, in the glances the two exchanged but they were both the type to not acknowledge their feelings, shove them down until they were forced up.

“It’s going to be okay, Thomas,” James whispered. He gently squeezed his friend’s hand and sighed. “It’s all going to be okay.”

 

After another three hours Thomas was feeling more like himself. James was by his side, flicking through the TV channels and trying to work out when they could head home.

Thomas’ phone buzzed lightly on the side and he glanced at it before James picked it up.

“This is Thomas Jefferson’s phone. He’s not available right now, can I take a message?” James asked, sounding bored. Thomas watched him freeze. “Uh- yeah, I can get down there.” Thomas raised an eyebrow but James just shook his head. “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.” With that, James hung up.

“What was that?” Thomas asked.

“The police station,” James responded. Thomas looked away.

“I don’t want to talk to them,” Thomas whispered. “Not yet. Not-”

“I need to talk to them. Just a bit of paperwork, I swear. You- it’s about storing the samples until you’re ready to report it.”

Thomas nodded numbly, feeling sick to his stomach. Somewhere in a police freezer was his blood and Adams’ sperm mixed together. The pictures of his dislocated hip were in a folder just in case. It would be in a case file, as if this night wouldn’t haunt his nightmares for years or had destroyed his life.

“Thomas?” James asked softly. Thomas shook his head, not knowing how to verbalise the sickness deep in his stomach.

“I’m tired. You go. Call me if they need my verification or anything.”

“Okay. It’ll all work out, Thomas.”

“Yeah. It did last time, didn’t it?” Thomas scoffed and stared down at the blankets in front of him. “It-” Thomas shook his head. “Go on.”

“Thomas-”

“Go. I’m gonna sleep.” Thomas pulled his blanket further up his body and closed his eyes. He heard James stand and then slowly walk away. Thomas sniffed softly and felt tears dribbling down his face.

Last time he’d been safe in the knowledge he wasn’t dating Adams anymore. But Adams had found him and had hurt him worse than ever. He wasn’t safe, he could never be safe. His rapist was walking the streets without a single repercussion while Thomas was lying alone in a hospital bed with no-one left for him.

He couldn’t quite shake the feeling he deserved it.

 

Thomas flicked open an eye as someone knocked on the door. He groaned gently before he sat up. It was probably James, back from the police station.

“Come in,” Thomas mumbled. He rubbed at his eyes as the door opened to reveal Alexander. Thomas froze at the sight of him.

Alexander’s lip was split and one of his eyes was puffed up and quickly bruising. He was moving stiffly as if he was in a lot of pain.

“Thomas?” Alexander whispered softly. Thomas stared at him in fear. He opened his mouth but his words were gone. Alexander looked away for a moment before he sucked in a breath. “I- I’m sorry I left so quick earlier.”

“Where’d you go?” Thomas asked. Alexander slowly sat down in the chair next to Thomas and sighed for a long moment.

“Went to Adams. Worked out some of my aggressions.” Alexander shrugged. “Turns out he’s got a mean right hook.”

“Why would the fuck would you do that?” Thomas sat up straighter and sucked in a breath of pain as he did. Alexander’s eyes widened in fear for a moment.

“Cause he hurt you, baby,” Alexander whispered. Thomas frowned at that before he nodded slowly.

“You didn’t want _him_ to hurt me.”

Alexander frowned at that and opened his mouth before he closed it again. Thomas watched as Alexander Hamilton sat there, almost speechless.

“I didn’t want you to be hurt.”

“I’m resilient. I-”

“Thomas-” Alexander shook his head. “You- why’d you never tell me you and Adams dated?”

“I didn’t- I didn’t like it. Didn’t like being reminded how weak I was,” Thomas whispered.

“You-” Alexander sighed and put a hand to his face. “Thomas, I- I don’t think you’re weak. I never have. You- when James was picking me up from the police station he told me the bare minimum.”

“What did he say?”

“He told me you and Adams were in a relationship for a couple of years. It got abusive. Very abusive. He- he broke your bones, burned you, scarred you and- and he raped you.”

“It wasn’t real rape,” Thomas whispered. “Just-” Thomas shrugged. “He sometimes didn’t- didn’t accept no. And-”

“And that’s rape.”

“It’s- it’s not-” Thomas broke off. It was different but he didn’t know why. It had to be. It had to be different.

“When did he rape you?”

“When I didn’t want to fuck him. When- I don’t wanna talk about it, okay?”

“He hit you. He- fuck, he raped you and I walked in on it and left. How could I have done that to you?”

“It wasn’t-”

“It was everything, Thomas. It was fucked up. I shouldn’t have left. I knew there was something wrong with you all the way through that evening and I didn’t do anything to stop it. I didn’t ask you or- or- I could have stopped this!”

“Nothing stops him,” Thomas whispered. “He-” Thomas broke off and shook his head.

“It’s why you flinch isn’t it?” Alexander asked softly. “I mean, I noticed it but I never asked. Thought it was your father or something fucked up. Didn’t think it was that…”

“I can’t get myself to stop that. It’s just- just a habit. I can try though. I- I dropped my accent for you. I can-”

“You dropped your accent?” Alexander asked. Thomas nodded slowly. Alexander frowned.

“You don’t like Virginians,” Thomas said softly. “So I- I tried to stop myself being Virginian.”

Alexander blinked slowly in surprise before he took in a deep breath.

“What else did you change?” Alexander whispered.

“Not much. Just- just small stuff.”

“Is there- is there stuff he made you change that you want to start again but didn’t because of me?” Alexander asked. Thomas looked away and Alexander sighed.

“I used to play the violin,” Thomas whispered.

_“What’s the fucking point of that instrument?” Adams slurred out. Thomas stared dumbly at him for a moment. “Sounds like a cat screeching. Or a fox fucking.”_

_“I’m tuning it.”_

_“Are you fucking talking back to me?” Adams snarled out, putting down the beer can in his hand. Thomas shook his head and turned back to his phone to play the A note again. He listened to it a few times before he drew the bow over the strings, feeling the instrument vibrate through his body._

_Then it was being ripped from his hands and Thomas stared in horror as Adams threw it to the floor. His boot came down on it and crashed through the body of the violin. It lay there pathetically for a moment before Thomas looked up. Adams was staring at him._

_Thomas felt rage fill him and he used the bow that was still in his hand to hit Adams. He got one hit in before Adams was on him, punching at his arm until his hand loosened enough for Adams to grab the bow._

_Adams stared at it for a moment before he began to manhandle Thomas. Thomas fought back but then Adams growled and that one sound was enough for his legs to go weak. Adams brought Thomas over his knee like he was a child and pulled down his pants and underwear. Thomas stared mournfully at the remains of his violin._

_“You know, it could have sounded good,” Adams purred out. “If it wasn’t held by someone like you. It’s your fault it’s broken. I think that deserves a good old fashioned punishment.”_

_Thomas jolted forwards as the bow came down across his backside. He tried to move away but Adams pressed down on his back._

_“I think you should lie there and think very, very carefully about what you’ve done,” Adams whispered. “Don’t make me make this punishment worse.”_

“The violin’s cool,” Alexander offered weakly. Thomas stared at him before he glanced away. “Why- why did you stop?”

“I was too loud,” Thomas explained quietly. “So he- he broke my violin. Beat me with the bow and- shoved it inside me.”

“What the fuck?” Alexander breathed out. Thomas smiled weakly.

“Don’t worry, a bow’s too big to fit all the way. Didn’t even do any permanent damage. Just- just fucking hurt like hell.”

“You’re making me want to go back and beat him up some more,” Alexander warned. Thomas looked away. “Thomas?”

“I don’t like violence. At- at all.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t like raised voices or orders. Don’t like it when you-” Thomas paused for a moment. Did he dare bring up anything else? Shouldn’t he just be grateful for Alexander as he was?

“Go on, Thomas.”

“I don’t like it when you touch me from behind,” Thomas whispered. “It- it makes me- he’d do it and if I jumped he’d yell at me and I- I always jumped.”

“Okay.” Alexander sighed before he leant forwards. “Can I kiss you?” Thomas smiled and closed the gap, pressing his lips to Alexander’s. “I’m so fucking sorry for not noticing this. And- and if you wanted to walk out the door right now I wouldn’t judge you one bit. But if you want to make this work-”

“I was gonna propose to you,” Thomas admitted quietly. Alexander paused. “I- I couldn’t decide on a ring. None of them fitted you.”

Alexander smiled gently before he pulled a black box from his pocket. Thomas stared at it in amazement as he flipped it open to reveal a silver band with words inscribed around the edge.

“I- I’ve been carrying this around for the last month. Last night I nearly threw it away but I’m so fucking glad I didn’t.”

“Are you- I mean-” Thomas broke off. “Alexander I can’t- I can’t have sex with you. Not for- not for a few weeks and-”

“Stop,” Alexander commanded. Thomas snapped his mouth shut obediently. “No, wait, shit. I mean-” Alexander sighed. “I’m not with you for your body. I’m not with you for sex. I love you, Thomas Jefferson. And that’s not changing because some monster hurt you.”

“He- he did more than hurt me. He-”

“I don’t care. I love you, Thomas. The wedding won’t be for a while. Maybe a long while but- but I love you. And I would really like rings to remind us of that.”

“Yes.” Thomas smiled. “I wanna marry you, Alexander.” Thomas leant forwards and gently kissed Alexander. Thomas felt tears fill his eyes and he began to sob as he clung to Alexander like he was the only thing left in the world.

“It’s okay, Thomas. I’m not going anywhere,” Alexander whispered. “I’m by your side no matter what.”


End file.
